h1

My Own Rupture Farms

November 4, 2009

It’s deathly quiet here today.  That’s the way management likes it.  When too much idle “chit chat” occurs, the result is an email blast saying to end it.  I have headphones that I use occasionally to help cut the silence – but on busy days, it just interferes more with my work than it helps ease the tension of the uncomfortable quiet.

Once upon a time, we took turns streaming music at a tasteful volume in our little workgroup area.  Then the “no-streaming” memo went out.  Something about it using up too much bandwidth.  So I plugged my iPod into my computer speakers.  Shortly thereafter, my fallen counterpart was accused of being defiant and contuing to stream music.  There was even an allegation of proof that she was using more bandwidth than everyone else in the office.  I couldn’t believe the dishonesty I heard coming from my own employer’s mouth, since it was I who was the culprit in the apparent “unlawful noise” violation.  No one had said “no music”, just no streaming.  Clearly, no noise at all is what was meant.

It feels like Rupture Farms, to this technogirl.  My internship for a college degree in Fine Arts was working within the realms of the real Rupture Farms environment at Oddworld Inhabitants.  Back then, the dark, dreary and dangerious world I was a part of was, well, exhilarating and inspring …

Production Design from Abe's Oddyssee

Production Design from Abe's Oddyssee

Working for this version of Rupture Farms is demotivating and depressing.  There’s no talking, no positive, non-productive noise allowed … at least when management is present.  It’s gloomy, and not in the way that thrills me.  Even with the lights on and blinds drawn, it stays dark here.

My days are long and I’m at a loss  ….  :-(

h1

So, yeah …

November 2, 2009

One of my friends and co-workers just got fired. For bullshit reasons, even. If I was guaranteed unemployment, I would leave – just on principle.

 

 

I keep saying this place sucks. I don’t lie.

h1

My Integra GSR

November 2, 2009

I’ve been looking for the perfect 2001 Acura Integra GSR for a little over a year now. And I’m very particular, too. While I plan to make lots of mods to it (or rather, have my brother make the mods), I want a clear title and a clean-burning original engine for under $5500. Is that too much to ask? I don’t think it is.

Considering my job working in advertising in the car industry, it would be an easy task to find exactly what it is that I’m looking for. Well, there are advantages and disadvantages to having access to the inventory of over 2000 auto dealers. The advantage is, I have access to searching over 800,000 cars for exactly what it is that I’m looking for – most, with pictures already in the database, and about half with a vehicle history report. The disadvantages, looking at cars that might be potentially 3000 miles away and having access to the price the dealer wants to charge for it.

So, I find the PERFECT 2001 Integra GSR – clean title, beautiful leather interior, 105k miles on the original, clean burning engine ….

2001 Acura Integra GSR

Only to see that the dealer wants $10,995 for it. Wow. I’d go to Oregan for this … but not that this price. I guess I’ll keep watching Craigslist for my non-smoker.

h1

Back on the Chain Gang

October 23, 2009

I think prison inmates have more privileges than I do during my 8-5 shift.  This morning’s memo from the Warden:

From: Josepha Stalin
Sent: Friday, October 23, 2009 7:46 AM
To: teamslo
Cc: Boss 1; Boss 2

Subject: Noise level

There has been a lot of chit chatting going on in the office. Let’s try to keep this down please. [...] If you feel that you don’t have enough to do, come see me and I can definitely find something for you.

Josepha Stalin  
Team Manager

I was already tired and partly hungover when I got in this morning.  I’m always on the border of being grumpy.  This officially pushed me over the edge.  Ugh. 

Back to my pile of rocks …

h1

I’m on Cloud 9

October 14, 2009

My initial run through the Cloud 9 drive-thru was a complete accident, sort of.   Since I began commuting to San Luis Obispo for work a year ago, I’ve made the Starbucks by my house a regular stop on my way to work (no, not every single day – but just often enough that they know my “regular” drink – a quadruple shot of espresso with nonfat steamed milk and sugar-free vanilla syrup).  In the past few months, however, I started running later and later, and Starbucks started to become slower and slower, with longer lines piled up in the drive-thru.  Anyone who knows anything about me probably knows at least these two things … I’m impatient, and I don’t wait in lines.

So, one day, a few short weeks ago, I was running late (as usual) but really needed my espresso fix, and … knowing the line and wait at the Creston Road Starbucks would be unacceptable considering my tardy status,  I said screw it to my familiar pit stop.  I’m willing to be daring and try something different – so I swung through the Cloud 9 drive-thru right before getting on the freeway before work.

I just have  to say that the little drive-thru coffee *stop* off Goldenhill Road, right before Union Road, in Paso Robles turned out to be the absolute BEST!  Not only is the coffee exquisite, but the two lovely ladies who are so cheery first thing in the morning deserve accolades for being just that.  For being the only two manning the espresso machine, they were fast, efficient, made me a “custom” order (quadruple shot of espresso with mocha, sugar-free caramel syrup and nonfat steamed milk) and served it up with a brilliant smile and an equally bright attitude.  To me, first thing in the morning, attitude is everything.

I’ve hit up Cloud 9 for java now 5 times for my daily fix in the past 2 weeks.  Last week, I ran into the awkward experience of having no cash, and not being able to find where I put my debit card last.  And would you believe, after telling them I’d have to pass for the day, they offered to float me for the day, and I could just pay them later.  Okay … wow.  Like, does that happen anymore?  I think not.  Thankfully, I located my debit card right as they had my “usual” ready to go, so I didn’t have to take them up on their charitable offer.  But still, things like that don’t go unnoticed.  I’ll be a loyal customer now.

Today, I ventured away from my normal drink and went for the full-on pumpkin spice latte.  I loooooove pumpkin!  And considering the mess of a social life I get to ponder in my 30-minute commute every day to work, it put me in the most fabulous mood ever.

Thanks, ladies at Cloud 9!

h1

Passive-Agressive Notes, SLO Office Style

September 16, 2009

Yeah, I could easily start my own PassiveAggressiveNotes.com site with all the P/A communication that flies around my office.  And here I was just thinking this morning about the irony of how my company made one of the top Vegas employers lists last year, considering the shit that gets doled out on a daily basis.  My problem is, the economy sucks too bad to throw away a well-paying  job with benefits in order to find something a little less abusive.  So, in order to amuse myself – and perhaps document some of this garbage, should I need it in the future … I’ll just start posting the passive-aggressive nonsense I have to deal with on a daily basis here.

And why not?

 

From: The Boss 
Sent: Wednesday, September 16, 2009 3:41 PM
To: teamslo
Subject: upgrade report

 

Was I speaking to hear myself talk on Friday…let’s participate here people…send over your upgrades for my review

 

dealer name, the upgrade and the amount

 

thx

 

Xxxxx Xxxxxxxxx

Co-Founder / COO

xXxxXxxxx.com

h1

Don’t spit into the wind.

September 8, 2009

Anyone who knows me knows I’m not a very serious person.  I love to have fun, I’m very laid-back and easygoing, and I’m usually the last person who will get offended over something.  But mess with my family or my money, and you’ll get a whole different personality.  Trust me on this one.

Just thought I’d share.  :-)

 

h1

Hoodwinked!

September 3, 2009

It’s been awhile since I’ve updated – and this is a good thing.  It only means I’m too occupied to sit at my computer and type with one hand and hold a bottle in the other.  This is good.  Yeah?

So, I’m back to being single again.  I’m sure no one saw this coming.  In a nutshell, it was due to some rather interesting posts found on Casual Encounters section of Craigslist.  The irony … on weekends I’d stay in, I’d drink and peruse those ads for entertainment.  I tried to picture what kind of desperate individual would cast that kind of a net, knowing full well the bottom dwellers they might dredge up.  Now I know.  They’re bottom dwellers, too.

If you’ve posted on that section of Craigslist before, I’m not going to apologize.  Clearly, you have issues you need to look into.

I’m actually REALLY enjoying my single status right now.  Probably a bit too much.  In fact, I’m thinking I should probably make an appointment at the clinic here pretty quick (haha … just kidding).

h1

Are we there yet?

June 23, 2009

Honestly, I’m not without sympathy.  In fact, my initial reaction to just about any adverse feeling is to sympathize – to my own detriment, sometimes.  But I have to say, I’m getting pretty tired of the “tired” excuses.  Not talkative, because he’s tired.  Grumpy and short, because he’s tired.  I understand that he has an exhausting and stressful job.  I really do!  Honestly, though … this is starting to feel like he wants me to get so tired of all this that I throw in the towel.  Every time I ask him if things are ok … if we’re okay … of course.  Why would I ever think otherwise?

Things aren’t okay.  The train got derailed, and I’m having a really difficult time getting it back on track, it seems.  I would say “we’re” having a difficult time, but it’s starting to look like I’m the only one who gives a shit about this relationship anymore.  Gone are his enthusiastic phone calls, the texts – “Who loves you?!”.  The random, albeit infrequent emails he used to send me when I was at work.  It’s all gone.  Faded to a cordial relationship where it sounds like we’re barely tolerating each other.  Frankly, I don’t even think he’s tolerating me at all.  Hence, the “tired” excuses.

Well, he’s off on another fire.  Out of cell range, most certainly.  I can’t even imagine what he thinks or feels about me anymore.  He’s so withdrawn.

Me, I’m just purely frustrated.  Sadly, I’m impulsive, vengeful, and lack self-discipline most of the time.  Just when I think things are different and I can actually maintain a committed relationship – all this happens.  Even if it’s not what I think it is (because, certainly, I’ve felt like I’ve been losing my mind lately) … I’m unhappy and unsettled, which drives me to make dumb mistakes. 

I’m so torn.  1 week before my 7-day vacation.  I had pretty much decided to drive to Ahtanum and spend it there.  Now, I’m thinking I should just call it quits and stay home and sulk.  It’s so hard, because I love him.  I love him and I’m unhappy.  This can’t be what it’s all about.

 

h1

A little smooching never hurt anyone … right?!

June 18, 2009

God. But seriously … why did I feel so not right about it?! I’m just going to take the high road and claim that I actually feel a bit of guilt because I use people. Or … wow. Maybe I feel bad because I don’t feel bad that I’m seeing just how close to the line I can get.

As usual.

The self-saboteur. Always. But, he did taste like strawberries.  That’s just not fair.